markofthewise | Sokka the 73rd

Entry tags:

Sokka the 73rd - [Action/Voice]

[The house was demolished. And apparently it didn't have the decency to start putting itself together again. Not to mention the whole town was soggy. Most of Sokka's stuff in his room had been damaged. Some of it was salvageable, much of it he had to just throw out. His important valuables were in the basement and though there was a few inches of water down there, his stuff was up high and out of reach. Still, another mess to clean. At least there were two waterbenders in the house to clean that up. For a lover of stuff, Sokka was pretty put out by it. He hadn't been able to sleep in his room because of it. In a way though, he couldn't be upset. It felt right. Like starting over.

And then there was the smithy. Or what was left of it. The whole thing was rubble now. He wasn't even sure if there was a point in trying to pick through it. Best to wait until the Malnosso fixed it, right? It was freeing up his schedule considerably, anyway. At least he was back to his normal practice schedule in the mornings. Even if two straight weeks of combat had left him... weary of it, to say the least. All the same. He found himself to be glad to be back in Luceti. Back in the library, studying his alchemy. Sure, he lost all his notes and would have to start over, but it would be easier since he already knew what needed to be done again. Still. There was so much to go over.]

A guy can't leave for a few weeks without the town getting demolished, huh? Anyway. So uh. A lot of stuff has happened this past week. If anyone wants to, you know, spare some of the good details? I'll be around. Interested. And if you want? I can tell you all about space. Which was pretty great.

[Very around. Like hanging out in the plaza around. No smithy kind of leaves him with no daytime hangout spot. Especially without Suki to spend time with. So besides his training and time at the library, he's very much a man with nothing to do. Evidenced by the fact he's sitting at a bench near the fountain, lazily sprawled out as he counts his one hundredth consecutive hit on a paddle ball. It's uncanny how good he actually is with it.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Buffy Summers -- now somewhat familiar with the dread of receiving a butcher's bill after each of her squads' missions -- sighed.

"If they had, would you have wanted to hear it?"

"I don't know." Probably not. It wasn't like he was a stranger to this kind of thing. The invasion of the Fire Nation hadn't been without casualties. Maybe Luceti had just spoiled him. "They'll all come back, though."

The confession tumbled out a little too quickly: "I...wonder what it's like. Coming back, I mean. Here. Here's version of coming back."

And if it was anything like the traumatic experience it had been at home. Would every one of those bodies go through it?

Would they be better off staying dead?

The question made him pale. And reflexively, he reached for his left shoulder, running his hand past his heart. It was like he needed to be sure it was still beating. It made him feel sick whenever he thought about that.

"I... haven't thought about it."

Edited 2012-07-11 13:02 (UTC)

"Jack said, uhm, that it was like being in nothingness. Forever. Or maybe that's just what his mind filled the time with, after the fact...still. I don't know how I feel about that. Nothingness. Being nowhere. At least--"

She watched his hand. She worried, but didn't connect any dots. Instead, she nibbled at a piece of doughnut.

"Maybe I shouldn't be thinking about it either."

Death is your gift. And the General's gift, too.

"What was it like? For you?"

"For me?"

A sharp intake of breath. How could she explain it? She's not exactly certain that Sokka's world has the right equivalent paradise to help explain how her afterlife had changed her.

Ah, well. She unwound and rewound the locket's chain. Best to start at the beginning, really.

"For one thing, I wasn't dead for just a week. I was dead for..." Spike's voice. She always, always heard it in Spike's voice. He'd kept count. "A hundred and forty seven days."

"That long..." He released a breath as he said it, not aware he'd been holding it. Already, he found himself thinking about Ed and his mother. How long had she been gone when they tried to bring her back? They had failed. And the price had been horrific. Human transmutation. A forbidden sin for alchemists. So he wondered how it had worked fro Buffy, after so long a time.

"How did it happen?"

Carefully: "Which part? The dying? Or the coming back?"

He had meant the latter. But since she was asking: "Both?"

"I..."

The truth was always so difficult. Buffy -- ever concerned with appearances before some certain loved ones -- worried that Sokka might misinterpret her choice. Or see suicide where she had intended sacrifice.

She had intended sacrifice, right? That was the party line; she stuck to it.

"I jumped. There was a very, very tall tower and I jumped. Because if I didn't do it, Dawn would've had to and...and I didn't want to live in a world where that could be allowed to happen."

So she did it for her sister. He didn't need more details than that. He understood perfectly well that kind of sacrifice. He'd make the same choice, if it ever came down to it. Or. He hoped he would.

"... I see."

"I chose it. It's very important that you know that I decided to take my leave, knowing it'd leave her safe. All of them safe."

Buffy hadn't been certain that they'd needed her anymore. Except...

"But Willow's a very powerful witch. You're not supposed to be able to undo a death like that but -- if anyone was gonna figure it out, it was gonna be her."

So. Magic. He wasn't really surprised, knowing what he did about her world. But it meant her friend brought her back. Nothing else. Just someone who refused to let go. It was a concept he could understand. But he came from a world where there wasn't anything to lure people into a false hope of bringing the dead back to life.

"And it worked." Obviously. "What was it like?"

She looked down at where the gold was biting into her knuckles and she remembered the blood. Again, it had taken Spike's commentary for everyone else to realize why Buffy's hands had been busted and hurt.

"Painful. Uhm. Disorienting? I was somewhere -- somewhere I should've been. And then all at once, I wasn't. I chose to jump; I didn't choose to come back."

Willow had made that decision for her. "So there was confusion a-plenty and -- and six feet of dirt to contend with."

He shuddered at that, realizing what that must have been like. She had her slayer strength. She was able to get out. Anyone else would have been trapped. Tormented with a second death. His reaction was in faint horror.

"... they just left you in the ground?"

There was no way for Buffy to remove the slight accusation that crept into her voice: "They expected me to just poof back to life, I guess. On my feet. They thought the spell had failed."

They'd brought her back and then they'd left her there and she had clawed her way out on her own. Wandered on her own. Saw her robot-likeness ripped apart amidst motorcycle engines and fire.

Hell, really.

"Sorry," she rushed to apologize once she saw his horror -- suddenly concerned that she might become somewhat monstrous in his eyes. "It's not a very good story, is it?"

"I didn't expect it to be."

Death was not cheap. He couldn't imagine it ever being that way. But it was chilling to think of it like that. Coming back in such a horrible way.

"Jack said it was just... nothing. What was it like for you? For that long?"

She shook her head.

"Mm. No. There was definitely something. Warmth. Love. Finality. I'd never felt so...complete." Oh. That sounded dreary. But Buffy rushed to clarify: "We have this notion, back home. About the afterlife and the different places you could end up.

Heaven is one of those places. I think I was in Heaven."

Torn out of there.

Edited 2012-07-11 14:08 (UTC)

"Heaven." It was a word he hadn't previously associated with the afterlife. He wasn't sure what happened in his own world. The Avatar cycle was obvious. There were some beliefs in reincarnation, from one life to the next. Or managing to exist in some form as a lesser spirit. But what she described sounded nice.

And it occurred to him how terrible it must be to lose that.

"Coming back must have been hard."

She'd been so honest thus far. Why stop now?

"It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, Sokka. Everyone just wanted me to be so happy to be back and I...couldn't even figure out how to feel, yet. Dawnie took it the hardest. I --"

She hadn't known how to be there for her sister. She didn't know what to live for. She'd gone down dark roads just aching for some sort of sensation. She just wanted to feel...

"I didn't feel very alive. Not for a long time after."

But she didn't want the tale to be all doom and gloom, so: "I got better. I mean -- I'm better, now. Honestly. So what if you don't ever really get over dying? You don't have to get over it to learn how to live again, I guess."

Her honesty made him feel a tad guilty. Katara had told him he should tell the others. Aang, Toph, and Zuko. He still wasn't sure he would tell them. Even if Aang had gone through something similar, it was a difficult subject to share. But she was right. Learn how to live again.

Because you never get over it.

"Living's all we can do. But she must have been happy. Having her sister back."

Pleased for the distraction, she finished off the doughnut. The sugar was a godsend, right now. It soothed some of her rattled senses. An artificial calm but God -- she would take it.

"It can't have been easy for her. Losing a sister a few months after losing mom." But Buffy had known that she would be in good hands. That had made the decision a little less weighty.

"Don't get me wrong -- I'm...really grateful for the opportunity to watch her grow up into the troublesome young woman she's become. And if I go home, I know I'll make the most of what I've been given."

But the hardest thing to do in this world...

"You've got a sister. You know how it is."

Dawn. She had lost her mother. And then her sister. Alone in the world. His insides wrenched at the thought that he almost did that to Katara.

"I do. She does. I-" He hesitated, realizing he was about to admit to it. It felt like a ghastly crime. A horrible sin he had committed and was trying to keep to himself, because how it hurt him and how it would hurt others. But he continued, his voice wavering just above a whisper. "I almost did it to her. I mean... I did. For an instant."

Oh. That knocked Buffy straight out of her carefully tended stability. The story of her death and return wasn't one she told often but it had bee told often enough to allow her a bit of emotionlessness. A bit of a façade as she imparted details. It made her look cold but...

But she hadn't felt prepared to hear the same taut terror in Sokka's voice. With an intimate knowledge of how painful it was to be faced with the possibility of abandoning a loved one.

She dropped the locket. The General -- his blood craft -- and the Commandant seemed so far away. So what if they had a seriously dysfunctional lovers' tiff? Family, she knew, was more important. Always. And to lose part of that family -- even for an instant...?

"Something happened. On the draft? Sokka..."

Tell me.

Edited 2012-07-11 14:46 (UTC)

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

clearly he knows nothing of DBZ

...perhaps he should be grateful.

where death is cheaper than in luceti

amazingly.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject