Sokka the 72nd - [Written/Action]

[markofthewise]

[This morning, Sokka trained alone again. Same time as always. Knowing the fate of Okita Souji was still in the air made the experience numb. If he was going to return, it would be in the next day or so. But it was so hard to think of death as just a temporary disappearance. Not when life had shown him what real death was like. What it meant to be a little kid hoping that maybe mom really did just go away for awhile. But she'd be back. And that dad and everyone else in the village were wrong. It was cruel that death was so cheap here. Just like everything was. He was tired and drained by the time he finished, having lost track of time completely.

Returning home, he had a quick breakfast. It was still early and most of the others were usually fond of sleeping in later than he did. However, usually Suki would take up before he headed to the smithy. Not wanting to leave her high and dry, he went to knock on her door. No answer. He knocked again. Nothing. Several thoughts occurred to him. Maybe she was sleeping deeply. Or had been kidnapped. Or had already woke up and left. Warily he turned the door knob and pushed the door open. What he expected to find was Suki's room. One slightly cluttered with her stuff and very much reflecting the woman who owned it.

It was empty. The mattress was bare. The dressers and tables were cleaned and held nothing. The curtains were drawn so that sunlight flooded the room. It was a thorough Malnosso cleaning job. It was like she had never been there at all. Like nothing had mattered. The room may as well have been on fire for how it hit him. He stumbled back. Closed his eyes and tried to will it away as a hallucination. But it was still the same. Empty. Empty. Empty.

If he walked out now, his housemates would be asking what happened. So, swallowing the lump forming in his throat, he stepped in the empty room and closed the door behind him. And then slumping against it, slid to the ground into a miserable pile. He wanted to go looking for her. Write a filter to her name. Desperately cling onto some slim hope that maybe this was a mistake and she was still in Luceti. But Sokka had always been the logical one. He didn't cling to faint hope when there wasn't any. He couldn't fool himself into thinking it was fake. And as it began to sink in, he buried his head between his arms.

An hour was spent like this, before he was at least able to pick himself up. He started to search the room, to see if the Malnosso had left anything behind by mistake. Or if Suki had hidden something for him. There was nothing under the bed or mattress, her dresser drawers were empty, and there wasn't even dust to be found in the closet. The last place he looked was the stand beside her bed. He didn't expect to find something in so obvious a place, but after pulling the drawer open, he found two things. The engagement necklace he had given her over a year ago. And a journal. Not the one she received from Luceti though. He held the necklace tightly in his hand at first. Tight enough that he was worried he might break it. For a long time he just stared at the image engraved in it. A sun over the waves. It had been a symbol of their devotion. Only now she was gone.

For a moment, he thought about wearing it. But since it wouldn't fit around his own neck, he fastened it around his arm instead. And then he opened the journal. He had an idea of what was inside. A year ago he accidentally stumbled on it while looking for something he lost in her room. He hadn't told her about it. And when he had seen the first note telling him not to snoop, he had managed to force himself not to continue. Barely. At the time, he had been upset that she was even keeping something like this. But now, it was the only words he had left from her. So he paged past the first note, expecting to find a letter for him. And for her friends. But each note hit him hard. Every single one of them were for him. He didn't have to guess when each one was written. Most of the time he could tell. He just knew. Some of them would tug at a small smile. But then another would crush him. By the time he was finished, his throat was dry and his eyes red and cheeks tear stained.

He couldn't stand to stay inside much longer. So when he was sure the house was empty, he finally left her room. In his room, he collected his gear. And lastly, his journal. For a long time he found himself staring at it. Of course he'd have to tell everyone. But no amount of sympathy or hugs was going to change things. And at the moment... he wanted to be alone. So he found a pen and an empty page and kept it brief.]

[Written]

Suki has been sent home. She's back where she belongs.


[The last bit felt so hollow and such a lie that he nearly scratched it out. Rather than wait for replies, he shut the journal completely, intending to ignore it. As he tossed it on the bed, the back cover of the journal was left open. There was a message from MARS. He was approved for a mission. Combat. Hard combat in Sirry Crags. He didn't hesitate for long. An escape from Luceti was what he wanted. It was easy to bury his feelings into combat. So he made his mark. Accepted. Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.

He then threw the journal aside. Hard. It hit the top of his dresser and knocked off some of the weapons displayed there, sending them to the ground. When he went to go pick it up, he found himself still frustrated and incensed and threw them aside as well. And then... the bed. That ridiculously huge bed. He'd never be able to carry out a queen sized bed on his own. So taking one of those weapons, he started to cut it in half. So he could carry it out back and let it burn. He had kept the oversized bed for so long because in another life, it was the one they shared as a married couple. One they might use again if they ever did marry. But that future wasn't going to happen. So for a half hour he sat behind the house, watching the pieces of it burn. Later he would dispose of the metal properly, but for now he didn't care about things like that.

In the end, he spent the rest of the day brooding. He found some privacy in the basement under the house, where he kept re-reading the notes Suki had left for him. Later, he returned to his room to clean up the mess. Now that it was an empty room with a bed, he had the space and privacy to practice what Okita Souji had taught him. But unconsciously he'd keep slipping into Kyoshi Warrior stances before he'd catch himself and force himself to stop. As evening set in, he sat behind the house, up against a tree near Katara's garden, and tried to play a flute he had not touched in a year. When he couldn't evne produce a tune, he threw it in the woods. That night, he tossed his blankets on his floor and slept there. It was a miserable way to sleep.]

[[ooc: Okay to sum it up, Sokka is being miserable around his house, but he's not straying far from it because he doesn't want to run into people. But people can seek him out and look for him if they want to. He will NOT be responding on the journal. So if you tag that way, he won't reply! (But maybe a housemate will? I haven't talked to them about that yet.) The day after, he'll be on a mission and gone for a few weeks.

Also, backdated to the 6th.]]

Comments

[Written]

[all7seas]

Thunderaxe --


Very sorry, mate. Very sorry indeed.

[Because what can be worse than this kind of nightmare coming true?]

--Sparrow

[action]

[fourteen]

[ Oh. Oh, no. Oh, darkness, no, no.

Xion only bites her lip, hard, when she sees the written message. She'll miss Suki, her teacher, a girl -- a woman -- to whom she owes so much ... but her thoughts rest with Sokka. What he must be going through. What he must be feeling.

He's been there for her so, so many times in all her years here. It's time she returned the favor.

If he doesn't want company, he can tell her to leave and she'll go. But she wants to try. Has to try.

When she finds him, gets to the house, he's in the middle of burning that mattress. And the memories slam into her like an ocean breaker, just a little chilling, of the last time she saw something so ritualistically burned. Standing on the road outside house 5 watching Asch and Luke and the house that had once been a home burning. In tribute, in mourning, in recognition that everything once beloved had gone.

It's so very similar.

She approaches, slowly, not coming in too close too quickly. But her eyes move from the mattress to him, and she can't keep the sadness off her face. ]

Sokka.

[action]

[markofthewise]

[He didn't really hear her approach, but he had expected someone would find him out here. She was the first. Probably not the first one he expected either. But he didn't turn his head or glance in her direction. His eyes remained fixed on the dancing flames. Sometimes... he'd see brief familiar images. But it was his mind playing tricks on him.

His time for tears had passed, but a dirty face where he had rubbed them away made it obvious they had been there. He acknowledged her with a quiet reply, with a voice that cracked due to a dry throat.]

She's gone.

[Maybe she already knew. Maybe she didn't. In a way, he's saying it to remind himself of it.]

Action

[installing]

[Winry began to respond to the journal before tossing it aside. She wanted to put down something immediately, but seeing him in person would definitely be better. She checks the smithy before making her way to his house. She can't think straight... Suki is gone. Her best friend's fiance was suddenly gone, and Winry couldn't help but feel a second hand emptiness. She had gotten used to seeing the girl around, and in conversation when Sokka talked. It had been so long, and they were so cute together... They were even one of her role models for how to have a relationship in Luceti. Now that was gone, broken, and even if they had their relationship at home to look forward to Sokka was here. He was separated from someone he had intended to marry, and Winry cannot fathom how hard that has hit him.

She runs the whole way. When the smithy is found to be empty she runs to his house. She's out of breath by the time she gets there, and knocks on the door.]

Action

[markofthewise]

[There's no answer. Sokka hears it, but no one else is home. And in his room, cleaning up the mess he made earlier, he's not eager to answer it. She may have to let herself in.]

[Action]

[vulcanblazer]

[Adell came across that message after a training regimen himself in the Dome. Biting news. It evoked a lot of his own memories, seeing those words. But knowing they were from Sokka, about the woman he loved more than any other, the woman he wanted to spend his life with? He didn't feel a sense of pity or anything quite like that. Empathy, though? Very much so.

He'd suffered his own losses, many, sometimes rapidly. But he had never lost a wife-to-be. Adell... couldn't bring himself to do nothing, though his own experiences showed him words usually meant little in the time following this. After losing Charlotte, Adell wanted to be left alone. Sokka probably wants the same... for the moment.

Adell won't bother with the journal. Instead, later, he approaches Sokka's house while the mattress is aflame. He ends up approaching from behind and to the side. He's carrying with him a bottle of what looks like whiskey, and a couple of shot glasses. But when he gets a few yards away, he'll speak up, one single word, while continuing to approach.]

Hey.

[Action]

[markofthewise]

[That voice gives him pause. It's certainly not one he expects. For a moment he glances back, not immediately recognizing who it is.

Adell. Of course. He remembered when Charlotte had gone home. And so many other people. He can see the bottle in his hand and his jaw tightens. Is that how he's expected to deal with loss? Drink it away?]

Hey.

[Nothing it up]

[godbent]

[...Ah, so that's that. It's the sixth, about two days now since she reset back to herself and she's no doubt talked to Winry by now even if it's not threaded yet and they no doubt reached some sort of accord. Some sort of agreement where she decided that no, enough was enough and she was a single woman who was the ex of the person she loved more than anyone else in her life. But she was okay with that- on Mother's Day she decided she was okay with being an ex and because of the ridiculousness of the experiment she decided she was okay with being single.

So really, her own initial reaction to reading that Suki has gone home reviles her on a level that she almost feels sick right after feeling it. She feels satisfaction. Vindicated that one of the factors in her own breakup is now ripped apart by the forces that be in Luceti. And in that same instant she found herself thinking "serves them right."

It only takes a split second for her to recall though that these aren't evil people and these aren't a narrative. It's Sokka, a person she has known for better or worse for a long time now, being denied any attention of someone he was close to. It's not the same as her and Winry's situation, it's more like a magnified version of her (Haruki's?) situation from years and years ago.

How can you say she belongs there? Idiot.

Forcing herself to feel something other than feeling sick she decides to set to work making something. She's taken to baking when people are sad and bringing them something but to be honest baking is both not her forte and not a passion. She decides to cook instead - Barbecue style as she's seen directions for in books in the library. She's never done it, but she's sure it can pull it off and relying on smoking the way it's apparently supposed to between collecting the ingredients and the supplies it'll take hours and hours, the whole rest of the day.

And she can drop it off at Sokka's place tomorrow, keeping it heated enough in the oven before then. Brilliant. She'll do that.]

[herotypical]

Word travelled fast in a small town. And it travelled at its fastest in the pubs and bars and places of social interaction. One quiet word was overheard while Buffy poured a mid-afternoon drink and it cut her to the quick. Suki, gone?

Sokka. With so much alacrity, she raced for her journal -- knocking over a row of three clean glasses on the way. How clumsy; how rushed. They shattered on the bar's hard floor and Buffy ignored while she flipped through pages and...sure enough, there was an announcement. She came to it a few hours late. That wasn't going to stop her.

She hastened her way through cleaning up the broken glass -- successfully cutting open the side of her thumb in the process -- and left the bar to look after itself. And why not? Some things were more important than making sure miscreants didn't overindulge from behind the counter.

Picking at the bandaid she'd wrapped around her finger, Buffy rounded the corner of House Avatar. She was planning to come upon Sokka's window and give it a good rat-a-tat-tatting, not expecting the front door to be a viable option. And she preferred windows, really. More intimate. Somehow.

And so -- unless there are some awkward curtains in the way -- she comes across his bedroom from the outside of the house, looking through the glass and catching sight of one of those Kyoshi stances. Her breath caught uncomfortably in her throat.

Tap tap tap.

[markofthewise]

There was a moment where, in the middle of his stance, he wanted to stop. He recognized it from training with Suki. From watching her train her girls. It was too familiar and it hurt to think about emulating what she did so often. He lowered his weapon, eyes closed and trying to find some inner peace. It didn't come. And the attempt was interrupted by the tapping on the window.

The curtain was partially drawn, enough to show what he was doing. It also gave him a clear view of Buffy's face, just beyond it. It was too late to pretend he didn't see her. Eye contact was made. So reluctantly at first, he moved to the window to open it. He really didn't have anything to say. Judging by her expression, he expected that she already knew everything.

[more nothing-ing]

[generalflirt]

[Well that's a shame. That's the immediate thought of Masaomi Kida seeing the note here. However, that quickly fades into something else entirely when she realizes the full implications of this. Marriage? Engaged? He'd liked Suki and he can't help but have his own disappointment he won't be seeing her again and now Sokka's going to be an absolute mess. This is on top of the death of Souji Okita which he really has only registered in the last day or two himself because he was evil when it was announced during the event.

Huh, so everyone's going to be caring for Sokka?

By the time he saw this it was in the evening and he'd already signed on to that emergency mission, confirmed it too. It's actually unfortunate because in seeing this after he knows he probably should have stayed in village for Sokka's sister. But that's arrogant, he'll just see her when he's back.

...And maybe before. He doesn't know, he knows Sokka won't want to see him but maybe he wants to see the beach. So he'll walk over to the barracks this evening under that pretense. If he were to run into Katara before then it's fine if he wasn't, then he'd get to see the ocean on a warm night]

[Action]

[savedtheworld]

[Aang had taken a moment to check the journal before classes near the end of the school-day. And he saw it. He immediately felt a grief settle over him. He had heard about this before, but this was the first time it was someone from his world. Someone he considered part of his family. So he felt conflicted. He knew she was fine back back home, maybe even waiting to greet them at the Earth King's palace, but that didn't stop him from starting to miss her already. She was gone from this world, and so were the memories they had, of talking about marriage and laughing while he tried on the Kyoshi uniform. And... he knew the toll this would have on Sokka.

He walked right out of school, skipping world sharing class for the first time, and he made his way back home to try to find Sokka. He didn't know how to comfort someone for something like this. But he would give it a try.]

[Action]

[markofthewise]

[It wouldn't be hard to find Sokka. He was outside, watching the last embers of the fire die out. The springs from the mattress hadn't burned and were blackened with ash and soot. For his part, he was sitting on a log, no longer standing. Just waiting. He wasn't sure for what.]

[markofthebrave]

[When Katara learned that Suki had gone, she felt herself stop breathing. She quietly excused herself and made as if she was going to see Sokka, but really, she only went so far on the path before she ran off of it to find her own private place to weep.

She was good at crying in private, at grieving over her own loss before going out and doing what she could for the others. But this was different, this was worse - sure, she had lost a sister, but Sokka had lost the one who lit up his world. It didn't change anything. There were always places in grief she couldn't reach. But these were deeper, dazzlingly, intimately personal grooves of pain... still. There wasn't anything else she could do.

Old Patterns. New loss.

Were things ever going to change for the better?

She dried her tears, selfish tears, and regardless of his desire to be alone, Katara needed to see her brother with her own eyes, determine if he was all right in all the ways he could be. Selfish, maybe, but she heads home. ("Home." Ha.)

Upon arrival at the Avatar House, the scent of ash and smoke sends her into a new panic of remembered loss, though the house itself still seems standing. She races inside just long enough to determine that the smell isn't coming from there, before circling back outside to find the ruins of... something. Something had been deliberately burned.

Sokka...

Her heart ached for him. After trying his room and not finding him - or that giant bed - there, she knew what it was and - Oh.

She made herself breathe and then decided to try his basement. Her footsteps are heavy on the stairs.]

[markofthewise]

[He could hear the stairs groan as she made her way down, but as he sat at his work desk, he didn't bother to look to see who it was. No one else would really think to look for him down here. At least, no one who had not already seen him. He'd received a lot of condolences and pity already. In this dark cave underground, he was trying to be alone.

As it was, he was shadowed by the light behind him, hunched over the necklace and the journal Suki had left behind. He was staring hard at one of the notes.

"If I ever go home then I think it's okay to date someone else. Just come home to me someday."]

[metalbends]

[Toph's heard the news, but it was already something she'd guessed at herself in the morning. Suki's room felt different. Lighter. Empty. And she'd known Sokka was in there, alone. For a long time. She considered going to check on him then, but ended up heading into the forest for awhile to practice her bending and meditate. It wasn't wholly successful. She keeps getting distracted by worrying about her bro.

So she heads back. Suki's gone. She'd been a great friend to Toph, too. She'd taught her a lot about fighting without her bending, and she'd always been a solid presence in the Avatar house. It'll be...weird to not have her there. She'd always been there.

She finds Sokka behind the house, momentarily shocked because the smell of smoke and fire.]

You built a fire?

[markofthewise]

[The fire was still going strong. Even thought most of the bed and its frame had burned, he wasn't eager to let it die. Not yet. He had tossed another log inside, to keep it burning. A pointless fire. Ravaging and consuming, doing nothing but hiding the evidence of another life he once lived. One that he'd eagerly go back to. Even if it meant losing the memories of his real life.

Toph doesn't surprise him. He also doesn't turn to look back at her either. He just offers a simple answer, with a raspy voice from a dry throat.]

Yeah.

[action]

[ayu_nee]

[When Sokka is done with his training he'll find Ayumu waiting for him— not in hiding, as a test, but waiting, calmly expressionless and holding a small basket.]

Good morning, Sokka-san.

[action]

[markofthewise]

[Well that's a surprise. he almost expects an ambush, honestly.]

Uh. Hi Ayumu. What are you doing here?

[blessingone]

[Timing, Malnosso. She really would rather wait a day or so before heading over. Her excuse for wanting to wait is that he'll have plenty of people coming the first day, or maybe that he needs some time alone, but it's really because she knows she isn't always the best at the comforting thing without slipping into tough love and that isn't entirely appropriate on the first day. But since she's going on a mission the next day (inner screaming even if she did sign up for it), she'll have to do it today.

And maybe that's for the best -- after all, even if he mightn't have necessarily sought her out, he came to talk to her on the day Shirley disappeared. ...Not that her relationship with Shirley was anything like his relationship with Suki, but close enough. She owes him that much, even if she wasn't willing to do it anyway.

She goes looking in the afternoon, but when he's busy brooding indoors, she's disinclined to make her way into his house on her own when there's still time to try again later. So it's not until she comes by in the evening and catches the sound of (bad) flute-playing that she does find him.

She walks up behind him and...doesn't say anything at first. She'll probably say something if there's a long enough silence, but she's guessing that he'll probably notice someone's there since she's not exactly a ninja. (And if she's wrong she can get a flute bounced off her head when he throws it into the woods.)]

[markofthewise]

[She'll be arriving just as the flute gets thrown away. Not towards her, but at the woods beyond both of them. It cracks hard against a tree, ruining it for good. That's the end of his musical side. Not that he ever really had one. However, her shadow betrays her presence and although he doesn't know who it is, he guesses why they're here. Someone else to... do something.]

... you don't need to say anything.

[anita_hero]

I'm so sorry, Sokka.

[She didn't know Suki and she barely knows him, but she's heard a little about them, and she knows how much it hurts to lose someone you love. Offering her condolences isn't much; she just hopes he'll be okay.]

[Nothing]

[deathsdoctor]

[... this is an unwelcome post. Unwelcome reminder of what Luceti couples eventually face.

... but at least it isn't forever. And at least she has a life to go back to...

Law chases such ugly thoughts from his head, and resolves to go down to the sea for awhile. Suki was a lovely girl and he had liked her. And the lingering fondness for the man who had been his son once upon an experiment makes those thoughts seem especially cruel.

... he does have pictures of Luceti Valley. Some from Maes long ago during the festival, some from his own camera during the mikan harvest. He'll look through what's left and see if he can find one of Suki.

And if he can find one, he'll leave it anonymously in an envelope for the man at the smithy where he can easily find it.

It is all he can do.]

[voice] so I heard this isn't late

[floralogy]

[Just seeing that sentence written out made something inside Ino fleetingly sting. She knows just how much she means to him and being the fan of romance that she is, this really saddens her more than it probably should. Ino had never met Suki in person, but still. She knows Sokka and to which his heart belongs to.]

I'm sorry to know that, Sokka. [It was solemn, void of that usual teasing tone she usually has when she talks to him.]

[action]

[so_shik]

[Oddly enough, Shiki first went to check for Sokka at the Smithy. When she saw he wasn't there, then she checked her journal.

...and she sees it. She sees those words and it's enough to cause her to stop right in the middle of the plaza frozen in shock. How? Better yet, why? Why would they do this to somebody else? It's one thing to take Neku away from her, but to take someone's fiancee away...

She's not sure if she's welcome in the Avatar house, but she's mostly worried. She shouldn't be worried, should she? It's Sokka. ...but it was Suki...okay. Okay, Shiki, stop being stupid.

By the time she approaches, Sokka's already outside watching the mattress burn. She hovers behind him briefly, arms folded over her chest as she watches.]

...hey. Sokka?

[action]

[markofthewise]

[By now the fire is nearly gone out. The metal springs are still sticking out of the fire. He'll need to figure out something to do with those. Eventually. When Shiki shows up, he doesn't really turn to look at her. Just focus on the fire.]

Hey.